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A Fine Romance: The Passage of Courtship From Meeting to Marriage
Lets face it, the road to marriage has never been smooth. Be prepared to
tolerate that in the early states one will pursue the other more until
gradually, according to Sills, there is a switch, then the relationship enters
the Plateau period. After the Plateau come the Negotiation which is, hopefully,
followed by Commitment. By the way, one bit of advice during Pursuit is to ask
the other to do something for you which will draw him or her closer to you, such
as painting a living room, repotting a plant or fixing a car. Do not borrow
money! And remember you don't buy a marriage, you build it; and as frightening
as the thought of marriage may be, it gives you more control of your future. For
those who have been burnt in pervious marriages, I leave you with Judith Sills'
advice: "If you are willing to love what is instead of what should be, you can
be happy in marriage."
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